Hello and welcome to your life. You get to pick your path (within reason) and
fly with it. I was just speaking with
someone this morning who has arthritis, and I suggested the unmentionable: that
they reduce or eliminate sugar (as well as taking turmeric/curcumin with black
pepper and maybe a little tart cherry juice.
Yeah, for real, try it.). But
that’s the thing, if sugar (crack) makes you happy, and you don’t mind that you
can’t walk or exercise, then go with that.
I don’t even mean that in a snarky way, I mean it literally. You’re the only one who is going to pay the
price in your own body for your decisions (although your death will affect your
family and friends, so go ahead and be a selfish pig if that’s how you roll.). You get to live with the chronic pain and
debilitation, your spouse can’t feel it, your doctor can’t feel it, and your
friends will either feel sorry for you (poor baby) or think you are a bozo for
wimping out on their antics (hey Nancy!).
But do pardon me, because I am inclined to
convince you otherwise. Here I go.
I can see how it seems to be the easier way to
eat whatever you want, smoke whatever/whenever/how much ever you want, sleep
whenever you want, work out only if you feel like it, but, oh, the price of
that life!
There was a study that wasdone in Potsdam, Germany, on 23,000 adults over the course of several
years. They asked them four (somewhat)
simple questions:
1. Do you smoke?
2. Do you eat well (this sounds really
nebulous, but there were specific guidelines that included things such as
eating a certain amount of fresh fruits and veggies, eating clean meats, not
eating processed foods, etc.)? 3. Do you maintain a healthy weight?
4. Do you exercise regularly?
People who answered with four healthy responses
(no smoking, yes, I eat well, yes, I maintain a healthy weight, and yes, I
exercise regularly) cut their all-mortality
rate (this includes all the biggies - cancer, cardiovascular disease, the whole
9, etc.) by 80% against those who
answered with four unhealthy answers.
Okay. I know you didn’t hear me
because you are not freaking out. Let me
repeat myself. You can cut your risk of
death by EIGHTY percent. I don’t know if
you know this, but 80% is some pretty darn good odds. If you had an 80% chance of winning a
kajillion (a jillion jillions) dollars, I’d say you might take it. If you wouldn’t, well fine, I will.
Kinda like this, but multiply the intensity by a kajillion. |
If you think about those questions for about two
and a half seconds, you realize that 3 out of 4 of them are your own choices,
and the fourth follows two others (in general).
This makes me want to reach out of your screen right now, grab onto your
shoulders, look you deep into your eyeballs, and tell you (probably in a highly
spaztastic voice), “You are a main player here!
You can make decisions to elongate your life, enhance your lifestyle,
and improve your quality of life! You
can do this! Why wouldn’t you?” And then you’d be all, yeah, I know, it’s
cool, I should exercise, but that’s just to shut me up and pacify me because
I’m jumping up in down in front of you still holding onto your shoulders. Well, guess what, homie? I ain’t letting go because you cannot be
hearing me if you want to continue to pursue your death.
Excuse me, is this your dinner? |
So what’s your excuse? You like to eat crap? Crap tastes so dang good that you wanna go
with that in your swan dive off of the cliff to your death? ERMERGERSH, just stop it. I promise you that if you start eating well,
your tastes will change. You will crave
what’s real. If you can break up with
sugar, you can look at a pile of ice cream and think of it as disgusting. (It takes a while, but it’s f’rizzo.)
And while I’m on that soapbox, sugar is worse
than crack. Do you want some
inflammation? Do you want to grow
cancer? Do you want to blow up your
strep throat? Do you want to stay sick
longer? Do you want to have horrible
cholesterol numbers? (Hint, big sugar
has money and they love it that you think it’s because of fat. They’re laughing at you right now.) Do you want to be addicted? Get your IV sugar on, baby. Light up your brain like a crack addict.
In fact, a study was done on rats that caused them to be addicted to IV crack and sugar and let them make their decisions on what they
wanted to get high on, and they picked sugar eight times more (read it again, I
said IV crack vs. sugar. IV CRACK!! Holy crap!
Eight times more! That is
freakin’ nuts!). They even picked sugar
when they were being electrically shocked. They were receiving physical punishment and
they went for it anyway. Does that sound
like you? Oh. Sorry.
Don’t mean to step on your inflamed, sick toes. Wait, yes I do. I want you to think about it.
Pick better.
If you need a hit, may I suggest exercise? It has its own crackalacka ways (well, I
suppose minus those bothersome times of spending days and nights strung out
under trailers in abandoned garages in the middle of Detroit). Once you get into a good groove, you can
become addicted to the endorphins that are released as you work out. Instead of all of the negatives that come
along with the horrors of sugar, you can trade that in for a healthier heart, a
happy body, better sleep at night, an ability to maintain a healthy weight, and
an increased libido amongst feeling generally awesome (I haven’t even mentioned
how you will actually be awesome,
too).
May I recommend swimming, running, and
biking? Perhaps a little weight
lifting? Perhaps a few (hundred) pushups
(doing them on glass shards to increase your toughness is completely
optional)? If you can’t feel the
motivation, sign yourself up for a race.
Perhaps the sheer horror you would feel at being last would inspire you
to dig deep and get your exercise on.
Please tell me that you have some inkling toward competition. Please.
If you don’t, well, take your sad sack self and do your pushups anyway.
It is not rocket science. If I told you I had a magic pill to make you
live longer, better, and with a clearer brain and vigor, I guarantee you little
druggies would be eating it up like crack candy. Well hello, it is available to you! You have to change (shriek!), but it’s really
worth it. Well, if you’re into living
longer and better, I guess. (Maybe
that’s not your thing.)
Oh, just do it already! (I’m still hanging on to your shoulders. Can you hear me yet?)
Peace, love, and live, dang it, LIIIIVE!
Ms. Daisy
Ms. Daisy
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