Facebook Breakup (again)

Social media is quite the thing, isn't it?  If you're not in the mix of it, you're what the rest of everyone would deem as either lucky, crazy, or just busy with other things.  Personally, I have a love-hate relationship with social media (mostly hate, but whatever...well, except for Instagram.  Instagram is bomb.), with hating facebook at the top of the list.

Why do I jump in and out of it?  Why do I do this to myself?

Quite frankly, I always hate it, but sometimes I participate in the madness because I need it for business.  It's hard to be able to reach ~500 (or however many) people every day otherwise.  You can toss something out and get a good response almost all of the time because the people in your tribe want to support you and help you.  When I ask for help, they are there to back me up.  When I am feeling hilarious and like I need to get on stage, I pop on and say the funny thing I heard that day and then yay, oh yay, I get the laugh face.  I love the laugh face.

But what is the cost?  I'd say about one gajillion billion pounds of wasted time, energy, life, and motivation.  I scroll through that sucker like nobody's business sometimes because for crying out loud, if you miss that your friend had a death in the family, you are going to be an insensitive jerk.  And what about the people who are having health problems?  You want to be there to support them for that.

To be honest, if you think about it, most of it is not that - most of it is people writing the ten concerts they went to, the meowquiz (or whatever it is), the passionate politicos, and pictures of people's children (playing soccer/football/baseball/etc.), dogs, coffee cups, inspirational quotes, and dinners.  (Don't get me wrong, I love pictures of dinners.  I will stop and look at that, no joke.  I'll be analyzing it...hmm, you think that was cooked in avocado oil?  Is that a Teflon pan?  For heaven's sakes, these people are using a Teflon pan.  Do I say something?  Do I compliment the food and then tell them it would have tasted better in a cast iron pan?  Am I seriously looking at a picture of someone's dinner for like three minutes right now?  Good thing this isn't a waste of time...)

Then there is the fine line between what you can say and what you can't say.  Do you want to be all political?  Do you want to be obnoxious?  Do you want to be hilarious but potentially offend people?  So then what can you say?  Am I going to have a boring page of saying nothing?  I can't bear the thought of that, but I don't really want to offend my friends, either.  Can I say what I want but in a way that won't offend them?

Okay, okay, okay, this is getting a little out of hand.  What if I just have it to comment on other people's pages?  What if I just kind of hide in the background and randomly comment?  You know what, I'm not a hide in the background and randomly comment kind of girl. I'm more of a let's-see-if-this-crazy-thing-can-be-worded-so-they-know-I-still-love-them-while-I-say-something-totally-bananas.  Yeah, that's still a time waster.



So, I'm out.  I am on the facebook fast.  I've purged it from my life.  It's nice, I have to tell you.  I don't have to check it, I don't have to wonder.  I don't have to think, "Did anyone think that little girl who can't stand slow walkers was awesome?  Did I get like 99 likes or what?  Are people congratulating me at finding such a winning video?  Are they reposting it because it is literally the best video they have ever seen in their life?"  (Which, BY THE WAY, that video was seriously the best ever.  Watch it.  Are you type A?  This was you as a child.  In fact, this is you now, you just know how to conceal it better.  No joke.  This kid is my hero.) 

I apologize to all of my dear friends who have to roll their eyes and my ups and downs with social media.  I know, I'm sorry.  It's tedious and horrible to watch someone go in and out of a relationship like that, but I really can't help it.  Sometimes it just must be done, no matter the longing and call it puts out to you.

Yes, at first it's hard.  It's like, wait, what do I even do when I go to the bathroom now?  Slowly but surely, you can find coping mechanisms to deal with the new changes.  They are hard and you don't like them, but since you've committed to the change, you have to just bite your lip and get through it.  Thank you, sisu.  (There are harder things in life.  There are things that make you wonder if you really want to wake up in the morning.  Dumping facebook should not be one of them.)



Do I miss it?  I miss the connection, yes.  I really do.  I miss how easy it is to get in there and find someone to reach out to.  People are posting funny things and some need the kind of help that you provide.  That's the hard part.  Not being able to swoop in and be that hand for someone.  (Although, if you're reading this, please, just call me.  You know I'll help you.)

But on the other hand, just imagine your level of productivity.  In fact, I have to tell you something.  I got down to ZERO emails in my inbox as a result of this change.  I'm ahead in all of my work, and I even attended a PTA meeting, where I gave my opinion on not letting teachers have traditional desks (thumbs down - are you trying to kill them?). 

Have you ever thought of it?  Have you ever wished you could just give it all up and ditch social media entirely?  It really is possible.  It's the fastest way to lose 1000 pounds, or at least that's what it feels like.

I dare you to try.

Peace, love, and Luddites,
Ms. Daisy

p.s. Just because I'm gone doesn't mean I don't love you.  I do.  You know I do.  xx

Our Society is Clearly Doomed: kid's cell phones - porn and a brain tumor

I saw a link for an article about whether or not a parent was too harsh for putting their child's iphone behind a picture frame because of their bad grades (with the words, "In case of B, break glass" on it).  Questioning taking a phone away - a smart phone at that - for for grades (or any reason, for crying out loud) is the blaring neon sign that we, as a society, have supremely failed.  After I rolled my eyes so hard it hurt and smacked my forehead and slid it dramatically and forcefully down my own face, I thought about how we are pretty much not going to continue as a society after the next generation.  It's pretty much guaranteed.  And for so many reasons.

First of all, giving your (especially young) child a smart phone is questionable in the first place.  Yeah, I know.  It's common.  "Everybody" has one.  Well, when I don't even have a smart phone, I can tell you that no offspring of mine will be getting one unless they have a job and they are paying for it.  Your kid needs a cell phone?  (Do you know what "need" means?)  How is that even possible?  Because he is never around other people who have a phone and can't use theirs?  Or do you not trust him to memorize your phone number well enough and need to program it in with a picture of your face so they don't screw up? 

A smart phone comes with a free pass to all that is on the internet.  Really?  You don't care that your 12 year-old son has access to everything on the interwebs?  I know I sound like a crazy tyrant, but if my offsprings are going online, I am sitting next to them or within earshot/view of what they're doing.  Call me crazy, but I'm not a superfan of having a preteen porn addict in my house, or having potential human traffickers hook up with my kid.

Besides all this, I wouldn't want to subject a small person to the amount of radiation emitted by a smart phone into their brains on their ears, into their boy (or girl) parts by sitting on their lap all the time, or otherwise.  CNET has a ranking for the top 20 highest radiating phones - Motorola Droid Maxx is #1 (and Motorola has taken gold, silver, and bronze in this list).  Check it out here.  I chose my phone from the reverse list and then found it on ebay for about $20.  Brain cancer? No thanks, I'm good.  Even the National Cancer Institute (out of the NIH) will tell you that it's a horrible idea and that cell phones are great sources of getting yourself a big ol' blob of cancer.  In order to reduce the chance that you are going to have a giant brain tumor, the EWG suggests you hold it away from your head, talk on speaker, text instead of talk, don't put it in your pocket or under your pillow, and only use it when the signal is strong.  There are physical barrier devices that may be employed to reduce the amount of emf/radiation into your soft tissue, and you may want to check them out if you can't live without your smartphone.  

Taking away a luxury item (like a smart phone) is such a pathetic picture of a first world problem that the shame of it reverberates in my brain (kind of like the radiation).  Add it to the other problems we have, like "my wallet has so much money in it, it hurts my butt when I sit on it", and "I won a sales campaign at work and was awarded a day of golf with the director, but I already took that day off to play golf" or, "I have to take a crap, but my maid is cleaning the bathroom right now".  

So sad.  Big elephant tears of suffering.  

Get a FREAKIN' GRIP, people!  Hello?  This is reality calling, wakey wakey, eggs and bakey?  

Nah, whatever.  It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine.  

Peace, love, and fail harder, 
Ms. Daisy