Amused at Kombucha Class

What up, peeps?  I was teaching a kombucha class tonight along side of my dear friend, sidekick, promoter, and I'm just gonna say it - agent (you so are, you know it).  

We were talking about the benefits of probiotics and kombucha when one of the ladies asked about the differences between home brewed kombucha and what you can buy in the store.  My personal kombucha is less fizzy than store-bought stuff, I don't know why or how, or if it's better or worse, it just is.  She mentioned how many of the kombucha sold in stores has chia seeds in it (which are a great source of omega 3's).  I said that you could surely put chia seeds in your kombucha (although some people don't like to chew their drinks).

At this, a sweet lady (who is cool - she has chickens.  Enough said.) said, "Chia seeds!  For lunch I had a donut with ice cream, but I put chia seeds on it!"  

I laughed so hard.  

I love this.  

I love this for the humor.

I love this for the irony.

I love this for the thought behind it.

This is a picture of knowing enough about eating well, but eating what you crave, and then maybe feeling a smidge guilty, so toss on some chia seeds.  

That meal is a picture of the United States.

Enjoy the little bits of life.  Be amused where you may.

Peace, love, and chia seeds on everything,
Ms. Daisy

Don't Get Sick!

'Tis the season for sick to swirl amongst the masses.  With many family gatherings (and you have no idea what "many" is until you've met my peeps) and work parties, and boogery sniffling children at church who sneeze on the people in the pew in front of them - you have quite the chances of exposing yourself to utter plethoras of germy wonders.  Why just last week, I got to hold a small actively barfing child.  It's pretty much everywhere.

Must.  Resist. 

Must.   Stop.  The.  Germs.

But how?

Well, I am not a doctor, although I pretty much pretend that I am, and in fact, at certain points in time I feel that I am at least 70% more awesomer (this grammatical structure is nearly proof of it RIGHT THERE) than doctors, so take my little plan of wonders however you want to take it.

But I digress.

Okay, so last week I was exposed to the boogery-est, most coughing in your face offsprings, and as I previously mentioned, as an extra bonus, I got to hold onto a barfing little.   (Please mail all Awesome Mom Awards right this way.)  I was pretty much bathing in germs, wearing them on my clothes, styling my hair with them, pushing them into my eyes and drinking them (tastes great with kombucha and chia seeds).  Now it is okay to occasionally get sick, but it is not okay to get sick when you are supposed to have a weekend of double parties and host twenty something people in your eleven square foot house.  You have to be legit healthy and halfway to crae crae with energy.  I needed all of my faculties and then half of someone else's to pull this off.  No sicky allowed!

What to do?

I pretty much went ballistic with every single immune boosting thing I could possibly think of.  Let me share the list.

I started feeling the tickle thing in the back of my throat and then the weakness and the cold sweaty thing and I "oh no you didn't-ed" right over to my awesome non-pharmaceutical medicine cabinet and started with Cold Calm and a few squirts of Sovereign Silver.  I popped Cold Calm every twenty minutes or so for two hours and I started feeling better - just in time for party #1 with the divas.  I then proceeded to drink boiling water poured over chopped ginger, half a squeezed lemon, and a spoonful of raw honey (which probably wasn't "raw" anymore after I dunked it in that hot of water.  Yeah.).  Now you can't just waste that ginger, you gotta eat those spicy bits.  Down the hatch.  Luckily, my dear sweet friend made a turkey and she had roasted an entire bulb of garlic - so I threw a clove of that down the hatch too.  Breath what?

The next day was filled with organic food sourced vitamin C, homemade chicken broth, more garlic, more ginger and a nap.

I was feeling better and better.  I think I floated over and past the coughing, boogery wonders, and then the feeling in the stomach hit me.

Oh crap.

No-no-no-no-no-no-no to the exponential infinity power.  It was T-minus twenty hours until the party at my house.  Stress + lack of sleep = lowered immune system = I am in trouble.  I was not going to restore loads of energy because there were still a pile of things to do (um, throw self across the floor playing volleyball in a league full of uber-competitive players, for one) and clean the house.  This. Cannot.  Be.  Happening.  WhatamIgonnado?

Don't panic.  Eat a pile of ginger, drink a giant bottle of Kevita coconut kefir, and alternate chugging down the kombucha.  Basically, ingest every probiotic possible.  And pray to God for help.

God helped.

So far, I've made it out okay.  If you ever are starting to feel sick, that is the time that you should boost your immunity, increase your probiotics, and consider it a serious job to get yourself some true nutrition (and see your food as serious instead of for fun - no sugar, just nutrient dense goodies). 

Here's my quick cheat sheet for some suggestions to think about if you come across any of the common winter yucks.

Sore throat:
- Sovereign silver squirts in the throat (Seriously?  You don't have this yet?  Run.)   
- shots of organic apple cider vinegar (with water if ya' ain't manly enough to take it straight) - and then slam down your cup and make a breathy, growly, manly sound while squinting your eyes in a way that may or may not be considered dramatically necessary
- gargle a mixture of hot water, salt, and vinegar
- netipot (stainless steel preferred, let's not BPA the inside of your brains) in case you have nasal drainage, which affects your throat
- up the Vitamin C dose (>1000 mg/daily)
- no sugar in your diet until it's gone (don't give the bad guys bullets)

Stuffy nose:
- netipot (mine is here )
- Sinu-orega nasal spray (HOLY COW this works.)

- sniff at eucalyptus and peppermint essential oils
- no sugar in your diet until it's gone
- homemade chicken broth with onions, garlic, carrots, celery, and celtic grey sea salt

Yucky stomach:
- drink a mazillion ounces of kombucha (this is an approximate dosage)
- alternate with a bazillion ounces of coconut kefir (also approximate)
- chomp up some whole ginger bits
- avoid high fat/dairy or whatever else makes you feel worse
- Bieler broth (steamed green beans, zucchini, parsley and celery with the water it steamed in, dropped in a blender until it is green soup mush)

The best way to float over the sickies is to have a good immune system in the first place.  Keep exercising, eating well, getting enough sleep (>8 hours per night), and having a positive attitude.

In no time at all, you'll be up for secretly (or overtly) racing the other people in the pool and on the sidewalks.

Peace, love, and have some more garlic,
Ms. Daisy

When Life Gives You Extra Kombucha...

...make kombucha fruit jello, of course!  

There are so many amazing benefits of kombucha and fermented goodies that it should perk your ears up just thinking about it.  What's that, you say?  Did you just ask, "What benefits?"

My, my.  Well, before I bowl you over with piles of goodness, let me just ask you this - did you know that traditional diets consisted of a bit of fermentation at every meal?  Our Standard American Diet (catch that acronym, lovies) is packed full of things guaranteed to mess up your mind, your body, and yer guts.  (Yes, I did know that was a part of your body, I just wanted to emphasize it for good measure.)

White sugar, white flour, cooked to death fruits and veggies, fake foods, genetically modified corn all up in all a ya'lls junk, beef from cows who don't even eat GRASS anymore, and everyone's favorite endocrine disruptor, soy - fill the foods in the grocery stores to the sky whilst people get cancer, allergies, diabetes, and a laundry list of issues up the wazoo.  

GOOD THING IT AIN'T RELATED, EH?

(Remember that whole "you are what you eat" thing?  Now that couldn't be true, right?)

Come on, my friends.  Let's get real here.  Take any one of those on the list and think about it.  When people stopped grinding their own wheat berries into flour and started gobbling up what was given to them from Mrs. Pillsbury and Mr. Swans Down, do you know that infertility spiked?  There isn't enough nutrition in their stripped flour to keep flies alive, let alone make humans thrive.  

Do yourself and your family a favor - see the Standard American Diet as the fad it is and get back to some real food.

Are you familiar with anyone who has trouble digesting milk or milk-products?  Maybe they can eat yogurt, but straight milk gives them gut problems?  May I suggest that the milk that is sold without the necessary enzymes that help you digest it?  Now I know that if you're going to be a grand-scale milk farmer, you can't risk something going wrong and since you can't keep your eye on all of those cows, you are going to have to pasturize it - but the better way is to drink it how it was made.  If everyone had their own cow, I can bet there wouldn't be much in the way of milk issues (and there would be many more happy cows).

The whole point of this is that we greatly benefit from enzymes and probiotics.  (Which is why a lot of people who can't drink milk can have yogurt.)  Our gut needs happy friends to dance around the maypole with.  If your gut ain't happy, your body isn't going to be either.

So I say do it the easy way - kombucha!  (And kombucha jello!)  Or do it the creative way - sauerkraut, dilly pickles, miso, tempeh, kimchee, kefir (water or milk), or make your own yogurt.

(But kombucha jello is pretty durn easy and fabulous.)

Now I told you I'd let you know the benefits - so, without further ado...

1.  Kombucha is a liver-lover.  It helps you detox your liver so it can do its job well.  No wonder it is called the "Elixir of Immortality"!  When your body has a toxic load, you better figure a good way to detox before you multiply the baddies.  Kombucha does just that.  It has glucaric acid - the cancer preventer.  

2.  Kombucha is your gut's best friend.  Ever heard of the benefits of probiotics?  Kombucha is delicious liquid probiotics straight to your belly.  I have personally had several times where my gut just didn't feel right and I walked over to the fridge and chugged a tall glass of kombucha and within the hour I felt 100% better.  Gut clarity helps mental clarity.  Giddyup.

3.  Kombucha wants to be on your immune system's team.  It's packed with antioxidants and boosts your energy.

4.  Kombucha may help you get rid of your sugar cravings.  Are you a sugar-holic?  Get on the kombucha train and toss the Snickers bar overboard.  

These are only a few of the benefits of kombucha!  It is an amazing thing.

Want some jello?  

Here is the basic recipe, but you can find a fancy and cute blog about it with pictures http://dirtyfloordiaries.com/fruity-kombucha-jello-bites/

And I must say, that website is pretty hilarious.  If you can't be bothered with looking at great websites, the quick and fast version of kombucha jello is this:

100% juice (pomegranate is a good one) - about 2 cups
some smashed fruit (optional) - however much you want
gelatin (I prefer Great Lakes brand) - about 2 tablespoons
1 cup or so of room temperature kombucha

Warm up the juice (not too hot) and put the gelatin in - mix until it dissolves.  The kombucha has to be room temp so that when you mix them together, the coldness doesn't make the gelatin blob up.  In your jello dish, let your kombucha be chillaxing while you gently add the warm juice/gelatin mix.  As you pour it in, stir like a fiend.  Plop the fruit in.  Stick in the fridge.  Peek at it more often than you should.  It will be done somewhere near an hour-ish.  You don't want to make the juice too hot either to kill the good enzymes in the kombucha.  Save the enzymes!  (We should get t-shirts that say that...)

Anyway.  Go on now.  Go get yerself some delicious fruity kombucha jello!  It's a great way to get your kids to get that probiotic goodness into their bellies.  (And yours, too!)

Peace, love and jiggidy jello,
Ms. Daisy

Death of a Scoby

Oh, the shame!

Do you know what horrible atrocity I have committed?  This is embarassing and dreadful.  My dear friends, I have...I have...killed a scoby.  Actually, a whole pile of them.

Let me explain how this horrible-ness happened.

So let's say maybe four months ago I was kombucha-ing in every direction, resulting in myriads of kombucha amounts.  I was running out of glass jars in which to contain it all.  This is somewhat problematic as I might have a slight problem obsessing over acquiring glass jars, bottles, etc.  Mason jars are a weakness.  And I was running out.  This conflicts strongly with my desire to live simply,  to be completely decluttered at all times and in general as I am employed as an organizational consultant.  (Let me just air out all the dirty laundry at once.)

So, obviously, I needed to stop.  Stop making more kombucha when we weren't drinking it at the pace my gigantic 3 1-gallon jugs were making it.  I decided to pause shop.  Keep some kombucha in those gallon containers with their sweet little scobies, and then also the giant pile of scobies in the scoby hotel.  I decided to come back to it when we began even making a dent in the kombucha supply.

We finally got down to just a bit left and I felt like it was time to start up a bit more.  I clambered up to get my scobies in their kombucha-filled jars, when, DEAR ME OH MY, NO, OH PLEASE, SAY IT ISN'T SOOOOO!!!!  But yes, it was so.

I pulled down two of my jars and saw, stuck on the bottom of the glass, a dried up brown sticky, plastic-y, hard as a rock, dead scoby.  Neglect!  Neglect!  Dreaded! The horrors!

Quick.  Run.  Go get the scoby hotel.  

Oh gosh.  No.

MOLD ON THE SCOBY HOTEL!!!!

(I guess I may have left these guys go for a while...um...)

All those scobies, dead.  At my hand.  From neglect!  

Please, my dearies, learn.  I cry out to you, LEARN!  You shall not follow my example in this - nay, learn what not to do and learn from these mistakes.  Several scobies lay dead, may this not ever happen to you and your scobies.

Check on them.  Give them kombucha.  Speak to them, name them.  Let them flourish and multiply.

Luckily, I had one jar that had so much kombucha in it that it didn't dry out.  I was able to make a couple new batches.  And now, I have learned.  May you never have to go through this painful experience.

It did suit my "simplify" attitude as now I only have about three scobies (instead of like the 300 I had before).  So, yeah.  The bright side?

Peace, love and love thy scoby,
Ms. Daisy

Kombucha: Part II - How to make the elixir of immortality

Many of you have wondered a bit more about kombucha: how much it costs and how in the world to make it.  Here's part one on the health benefits if you want it: Kombucha: Part I

Well, here's the scoop for you soon to be brewmasters.

As far as price - if you go to the store and get some, the prices will vary.  At a local health food store, half of a gallon costs $28.00.  If you buy the 16 oz. (I think?  Or is it 12?) of GT's it is about $4.99.

Steep, eh?

If you make a gallon at home, it will cost you the price of 3 tea bags and 1/2 cup of organic (or cane) sugar (plus water, if you want to count the price of running a gallon of water out of your sink).  

Cheap, eh?

Okay, now on how to make it.
   
To make one gallon, here's what you need:
1 glass container - gallon sized with a very wide mouth (I use a cookie jar minus the top)
1 wash cloth that you didn't use fabric softener on (yuck! poison!)
1 rubber band
3 tea bags (black tea - some people use green, though)
1/2 cup organic cane or cane sugar (beet is GMO and may kill your scoby)
about 1 gallon of preferably filtered water
a cup-ish of kombucha 
1 lovely scoby (scoby is an acronym and it stands for: symbiotic culture of bacterial yeast)

Did you just say, grrreat, where the heck am I gonna get a scoby from?

Well, honestly, you can get them on ebay, I think.  Now you've heard it all, right?  Well, besides that, you can get it at the Kombucha Kamp website.  They'll ship them to you.  If you know someone who makes kombucha, just get one from their scoby hotel (you can research that one, if you want - it's just a place to keep some backups since they double and soon you'll have more than you need).

Okay.  Now, you've got your stuff.  Ready?

1.  Boil a bit of your purified water on the stove.

2.  In your squeaky clean jar (but not with antibacterial soap - you don't want to kill your scoby - use vinegar to clean if you haven't got anything else), put in 1/2 cup of organic or can sugar and three black tea bags (no flavors - just straight black tea).

3.  Once the water is boiled, pour in a few inches of it onto your tea bags and sugar.  Let it steep and let the sugar dissolve for a few minutes.

4.  Remove tea bags.  Put them in your compost bin.

5.  Fill the jar with cold, purified water so that you bring the contents to room temperature.  Basically you have some sweet tea in a jar now.

6.  Wash your hands with castile soap or vinegar (NOT ANTIBACTERIAL - I mean, you're not the kind of person to have antibac soap, are you?  Dude.  C'mon, pitch that endocrine disrupting poison!).  Shake off, leave wettish.  Lovingly grasp your stingray, I mean, scoby and gently lay her/him into your room temp tea.

7.  Add your cup-ish of kombucha to the mix.

8.  Cover your jar with your washcloth and a rubber band to go around the opening.

9.  Put in a warm, dark place (72-79 degrees) for a week.  In the summer, it takes about 5 days until it's ready and in the winter, it takes about 10 days.  Adjust according to your temperature.  DO NOT put it in a humid place - the bathroom, under your sink - etc.  You can grow mold if your baby scobes gets subjected to too much humidity.

There's only a couple ways to kill your scoby, so pay attention.

1.  It's alive so DO NOT put it in hot water.  You will kill it.

2.  It's a probiotic bacteria so DO NOT use antibacterial soap on anything it touches.  You will kill it.

3.  It is something you need do do in a sanitary fashion, so do not be a grungeball.  You will introduce yucky bacteria if you aren't clean.  Keep kids and their goobery faces away while you are making kombucha and for the love of all that is good and decent, do not let them touch the scoby for the same reason.  You will either kill it or make yourself an e.coli cocktail. (I have to say this.  Most of you know what hygiene is - if you are a clean person, do not put yourself into a panic about this, it's just an admonition to be very careful.)

After about 5-10 days (depending on the season and how warm it is in your house), it will be time to check it.  Here's what you're going to look at:

1.  Does the kombucha look honey colored?  If so, good.

2.  Do you see any bubbles under the scoby along the edge of the glass?  This is good.  It means that fermentation has taken place.  

3.  Lift your washcloth away and look at your scoby.  Does everything look normal?  Does it look thicker?  This is good.  Does it have brown things hanging under it?  This is totally normal too.  Does it have weird spots on it?  That's not good.  Some people get mold.  It is not special mold.  It is that regular old bread crust mold you know and hold oh-so-dearly to your heart.  Don't drink it if you've got mold.  Dump it and start over (including the scoby).

4.  Next test: get a straw.  Shove it past the scoby, lift a bit up by using the stick-your-thumb-over-the-opening-and-lift-method.  Dump the strawful of liquid onto your tongue.  Does it taste kombucha-ey?  Or does it taste like tea still?  If tea-ish, cover it back up and leave it another day or two or three.  If too vinegary, you let it go too long.    In the middle of those two tastes is your lovely kombucha flavor.  It's like Little Red Riding Hood (This drink is too sweet!  This drink is too sour!  But this is one is JUST right!).

5.  If it's all ready, wash your hands with castille soap or vinegar and lift out your scoby to a glass or ceramic receptacle for a moment while you make more.  Pour a cup or so of your good, new kombucha over the scoby to keep it happy.

6.  Use a (stainless steel) funnel to pour out your kombucha if you're going from a big jar opening to a smallish one.  Stick the freshly-made batch of kombucha in the fridge in a glass container.

7.  Make a new batch!

Some people have freezing houses.  You may have to wait longer than 2 weeks for your brew to work.  

I've told you that you can kill your scoby, but I need to tell you that your kombucha can kill stuff too - it can kill plastic or metal.  DO NOT EVER USE PLASTIC OR METAL for kombucha.  It will eat the plastic, "Mmm, yum!  Plastic!"  It will rust metal. 

I hope that this has been helpful and informative for you. If you are more of a visual learner, check this guy out.

Peace, love and go get your kombucha on,
Ms. Daisy

The magical wonder of kombucha...and you.

Today I shall tell you about the magical wonder of kombucha.

Did you just say, "Sambuka?  What the heck is frambuesa!?  Or whatever you...just...said..."

(For the record, I think Sambuka is a town [?] and a frambuesa is the Spanish word for raspberry. Kombucha is neither one of those.)  Now.  Let's begin.  Kombucha is a drink.  It has been called "the elixir of immortality" by some and it has been around for, oh, let's say, like 2,000 years.  No, for real.  Not kidding.  This is just an ounce of the awesomesauce, hang with me.  Some people have put their nasty, mean cancer into remission with the concoction.  Getting interesting-er?  I think yes.  Not only are these things reported about our babushka, er, kombucha, but it is also repudiated to be an excellent detox-er for your liver.  You kind of need your liver.  Just in case you were thinking that's not a big deal, you would be el wrong-o (not even close to Spanish).  Your liver is the junk bucket of your body, getting rid of all that high fructose corn syrup you've been eating (Adam and A-beans, this is a good thing - don't argue, just keep sipping your 24L of coffee and read on).  

Now I don't know if it promotes weight loss or anything - I haven't necessarily heard that - but you could totally pretend it does, because I am quite sure if I said that, you would be drinking it up the wazoo.  Weight loss is such a huge industry and interest that you could pretty much get people to drink pig bladders if you said it would make you lose 30 pounds.  And some of you would do it, wouldn't yas?  Drinking pig bladders.  For crying out loud, please, for the love of all that is good and decent, work with me here.  If you would consider eating spiders legs or drinking pig bladders if it promised you the worthlessness of being a waif, consider the slightly more important thing of let's say...overall health here.  And actually, since it's a probiotic, you've got that whole...um... elimination of toxins from the intestines going on...perhaps it would be a slight weight loss thingy.  But don't be shallow, c'mon, big picture, big picture.  

So let me just tell you one very important thing here.  You need to drink it before you see it.  See the "scoby", that is.  Because I must be quite frank with you here, a scoby looks like an alien and feels like...a stingray/dolphin.  It is white and is generally shaped like a pancake.  I'm trying to protect you from the whole, "Thanks but, uh, no thanks!" thought that will absolutely invade your brain if you see the little dear scoby first.  Drink the lovely drink first, get all addicted to it (c'mon, I don't mean LITERALLY!) and then go brew some and you'll be all thinkin' you're cool since you're handling your stingray in the privacy of your own kitchen.  

Now, one other thing.  It is made from brewed tea and slightly ferments (awesome, something like .0000005% alcohol going on there) so if those things are forbodden (say that word aloud in a foreboding, deep manly English accent voice) to you, you ought to just sigh and say, yes, well, I guess that's not my thang.  People do give this to their children so I'm being quite serious when I tell you about the very miniscule alcohol level in case I just freaked you out.  Less than cough syrup.  Less than O'Doules, and 1000 times less than the rubbing alcohol the wayward vagabond is drinking on the city street under the overpass with the sign.  (p.s. I am totally in favor of you packing some snacks in your car to hand out the window when such opportunities arise.)

Ahem.  Now, where was I?  Oh yes.  Benefits.

I just got this for you from kombuchakamp.com.  She lists the benefits of the elixir of awesomesauce for you and heeeeeeere they are!
*Probiotics – healthy bacteria

*Alkalize the body – balances internal pH
*Detoxify the liver – happy liver = happy mood
*Increase metabolism – rev your internal engine
*Improve digestion – keep your system moving
*Rebuild connective tissue – helps with arthritis, gout, asthma, rheumatism
*Cancer prevention
*Alleviate constipation
*Boost energy – helps with chronic fatigue
*Reduce blood pressure
*Relieve headaches & migraines
*Reduce kidney stones
*High in antioxidants – destroy free-radicals that cause cancer
*High in polyphenols
*Improve eyesight
*Heal excema – can be applied topically to soften the skin
*Prevent artheriosclerosis
*Speed healing of ulcers – kills h.pylori on contact
*Help clear up candida & yeast infections
*Aid healthy cell regeneration
*Reduce gray hair
*Lower glucose levels – prevents spiking from eating

Woah.  Dude.  Insane, right?  After reading this list, did you just say, "Holy kombucha!!"  I know I did! 
So you're all like, okay, yeah, right.  What?  You think I'm a dummy head, don't ya, Daisy Pink?  You think I'm gonna believe all that.  What, are you selling me a miracle cure?  I've been around the block too many times to know that if it sounds too good to be true, it must be.  So what's your catch, Pinks?

First of all, no, I don't think you're a dummy head.  I think that if this were in pill form and marketed by Top Dawg Pharmaceutical Company, I'd be quite leery too.  BUT!  ALAS!  This special K drink doesn't cure you of anything.

What?

Yes, that's right.  It doesn't cure you of your ailments at all.  It reduces the stress on your liver from all the toxins you put in it from your high fructose corn syrup (Adam) or whatever else you've got going on in there - by purging and detoxing your liver so that your liver can do the work God made it to do.  Namely, clean out your body. 

Our bodies have a few lines of defense of getting rid of the improper crapola we put into it.  The first is our liver, the main junk system of the whole place.  If your liver is all freakin' out because you are slapping it in the head (or equivalent) with all that disgusting processed food, environmental toxins, etc. and it can't do it's job anymore, you've got a backup plan.  (Thank God.  No, literally.  You should.) 

You've got other systems in place in there - the last one being your skin (eczema, zits, et cetera.).  By that point, it's literally trying to leap out through your pores.

(And can I just recommend a book to you right now?  It's old.  It has no fancy pictures.  It was written in like 1960.  But let me just tell you, there are some things in there that you might look at with a crazy eyebrow, but there is so much good stuff in there that it will blow your whole mind.  It's called Food Is Your Best Medicine by Dr. Henry Bieler.  This guy was a stinkin' genius.  You'll have to find it on amazon or something because this puppy is out of print.  Get your hands on a copy of this and I promise you, it will change the way you think about food completely.  And then you'll feel ultrapopular because you have an out of print book and all your friends will want to be just like you.  Duh.  Isn't that the easiest and best way to seek popularity among your peers?  I thought so.  Anyway...)

So, anyway, I just want you to think about it.  Could this help you?  Consider it.

There is one thing I must say to you, though.  I must warn you.  If you do decide to get into it and go all stingray in the kitchen, you've got to be super hygenic.  You can't be a gross-ey pants because if you introduce outside bacteria into your scoby, you could end up with making yourself an e.coli cocktail.  And I'm pretty sure that's not what you're going for here.  Scobys can also grow mold if they aren't kept in the proper way.  If they're too humid or don't get enough air to breathe, they can get moldy - just like bread mold.  It doesn't have fancy special mold, just the regular run of the mill kind you're used to on your 12 day old loaf that got shoved in the back of the fridge/cupboard, etc.

If you want to do it right, find someone near you who has done it before and have them give you a hands-on tutoring session.  The wonder of kombucha is not only all these benefits that are mentioned above but (gasp!) there's another - scobys have babies!  They double every batch.  That means your friend can give you one of her/his baby scobies and you can go on with your bad self on your own.

If you have nobody in the entire circle of your world who has ever even heard of kombucha, search our wide world of the web and find a how to.  I recommend the KombuchaKamp website, they are very knowledgeable and they can even sell you a scoby, I think. 

If you want to see someone make it, you should check out this youtube video of a guy with no shirt and a flappy winter hat who does a great job of it.  He uses green tea, though, and I only use black tea, but it's all good.

Last thing.  I know you're thinking, "So what in the world does this weird voodoo thing taste like anyway?"  I have heard it was an acquired taste, but I liked it right off the bat.  It has a vinegary smell, but it doesn't taste vinegary (unless you let it brew for like 20 days and then you can clean your floors with it fo' sho').  Have you ever had apple cider that went a little too long and got all fizzy?  It's kind of like that plus a little "beer-y" from the fermentation and bubbly-ness.  Do you like beer?  Maybe you'll like it.  It also has thoughts of apple cider vinegar but not that sharp and bitter taste that vinegar has.  The longer you let it brew, the more vinegary it will be. 

Did I just totally freak you out by saying vinegar?  I know.  It sounds HORRIBLE.  In fact, I hate vinegar.  But I LOVE KOMBUCHA!!!  Seriously.  Be brave.  You can do this.  Put on your big girl undies and man up.  (Er, um...?)

Just see if you can get your little mitts on a cup of it and try it for yourself.

Your liver will thank you.